Changing things can make you feel better about yourself. You can feel so good that you start counting how much better things are going and how others are still stuck with their old habits and how fantastic you are and if they only knew how amazing your life is they would stand in awe of your ability to overcome lethargy and transform your life into one of ease and maximum joy!
Clearly, smugness is an illness directly related to delusion.
Still smiling smugly as I report on changes made to-date:
1. Give up candy for 360 Days of the year – If we start counting from today, I am right on track.
2. Eat more oranges – Definitely easier when you buy oranges
3. Watch less violent/negative programming – I miss my friends on Criminal Minds but not the dead bodies.
4. Turn off tv and computer an hour before bed – Because I have insomnia, I can say this happens two out of three times nightly
5. Put things away – I definitely put them somewhere though I may not be able to count it as “away” unless “away” is a euphemism for “still at the top of the stairs.”
6. Listen to more music – Ready to challenge myself more in this department. Love ya, Buble, but sometimes a girl needs more than one man in her life
7. Comply with doc’s suggestion to put warm compress on my eyes twice a day – Sorry, I can’t see what this says. My eyes are all crusty.
8. Use my Buddh-ish-ism powers more often – People are entirely too cheerful already
9. Drink more water – Yum, she says mildly sarcastically even though she’s trying to comply.
10. Eat gluten free – Never got off the ground. Found out Raisin Bran is made with bran. Eating just the raisins wasn’t the same.
11. Learn a new skill: cake decorating – Iced cake. Did not ice cake well. Fortunately, it tasted just as good.
12. Pay attention to time – what you’re doing through the day – This is frightening. Do not do this at home.
13. Resupply the medicine chest for flu season – I keep waiting for a sale.
14. Get tested annually for colon cancer – Talk to me next January but in the meanwhile make YOUR appointment.
15. Bring your library books back and set a regular day to return books in the future – Theoretically, this is happening as soon as I find the books.
16. Bring your bottles back every two weeks – There are no cube trucks for sale locally at the moment.
17. Philomena, Leonardo, Is Just Another Word for Love – go to Star Cinema More – Went to Philomena at the Star. Movies are just one great habit to have.
18. Wash dog bowls daily – They lick them, you know. Licking is how they keep themselves clean. Shouldn’t it work on the bowls, too?
19. Be the Change – Volunteer -something small – David Tennant is coming to town soon. I volunteer to play his secret love in real life.
20. Changing Your Religion – Fantastic history programs bring insight to world religions and often play late at night. When I’m tossing and turning the Naked Archeologist keeps me company.
21. Changing the Cost of Our Choices – Flyers are marked and awaiting execution
22. Kitty Litter Does Not Change Itself – I realized my kids are moving out just so that they never have to change the kitty litter again.
23. The Retirement Environment – I have a terrific budget. I can see where all my money goes and goes and goes.
24. When Your Baby Bounces Out the Door – Boxes are being collected. That’s boxes of facial tissue. I’m getting a little weepy about this one.
25. The Momentum Mantra – My mantra, “Tend Your Own Garden First,” is a slightly paraphrased quote of a translation from Voltaire’s “Candide” that helps me focus on my inner world, my immediate world and then, much later, the outer world. There may be a tattoo in that someday.
Change of the Day: Rethink being so smug about all the changes you’re making. Somebody may drop in randomly and test the veracity of your claims.